Runs, Mangos and Waves

I fear I sometimes come across on here as if things aren’t good and I am really struggling- I am but I also desperately try to find ways to be balanced and renewed. This weekend I found a little slice of Heaven here on earth. On Thursday after bringing some visitors to the airport Laura and I and 2 other friends headed for a beach retreat! We returned back to the mission this afternoon with sweet memories of eating too many mangos, too much seafood, too much sun, and lots of laughs. It was so refreshing. I was also able to get out and go for a few runs- always healing to my soul. For a few moments, I forgot where I was. It was refreshing!
Here’s a photo of the desolate beach we were on. It is just gorgeous, with wild waves of the Indian Ocean to play in!





Here’s our cute little house we stayed in…



And Laura and I…



Tomorrow starts another week, I am clinging to two bits of advice that I have receive recently.
First- Even though I may feel like I am going through “the valley of the shadow of death, I am just passing through- not camping within!”
And- as Psalm 11:4 says, “the Lord is in his holy Temple; the Lord still rules from heaven.”
No matter what the circumstances I experience (or any of us), the Lord is in his holy Temple! Feel free to remind me of this if I sound as if I have lost this focus.
Thank you so much to those who send such encouraging words! Prayers are keeping me going. Bless you.

Finally, as I struggle to share the depth of my experiences here, Hands at Work has made some videos that may show a bit more vividly, what I am doing. The links are below. I haven’t actually seen them yet but I trust that they will really help you understand the heart of Hands at Work.

One by One- George Snyman (founder of Hands at Work) telling the story of H@W
http://vimeo.com/1920449

My Hands – A variety of Hands at Work volunteers telling their stories
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vp9pdebZddU

Seasons

Since I have returned from Ghana, Mozambique has entered a new season. It’s a season I have never heard of. A season I have never dreamt of. I have heard of deer season. I have heard of mosquito season. I have heard of pumpkin spice latte season. I even look forward to mango season but now, I am told, we’re in hungry season. Hungry season? Hungry season! Can you imagine? Can you imagine a time of year when you plan that you'll likely be hungry? Maybe you’ll even wonder if you’ll have enough food to survive and make it through this “season.”
Since I have been back I have been busy with other things and haven’t been out doing a lot of home-based care but even sitting in my little house on the mission we’ve seen effects of the “hungry season.” Saturday there were 4 of us sitting around discussing budgets and the vision of Rubatano. There was a gentle disturbance at the door. I answered and greeted the young man in Portuguese. After the typical greetings he continued on. He wasn’t looking at me. He seemed ashamed, head hung low. I have seen this man around the mission before but I don’t know him. As he continued I learned that he was coming asking for money. His children are hungry and they haven’t eaten for 3 days. This man was embarrassed that he was having to come to us to ask for money for food.
I was disturbed by this visitor, I kept thinking about him the rest of the weekend. I came to realize that no man wants to beg. No man with children wants to tell anyone that he is unable to provide for his family. God didn’t wire men that way. God made men to be a provider. For this man to be to this point of desperation he probably does feel shamed. His ability to provide has been shattered.
On Sunday morning I had to get up in the middle of Church (here at the mission) and step outside. When I did, I saw the same man that had been on my mind since Saturday. He again started speaking, rapidly this time- not looking at me, never making eye contact. I then noticed his arm. He was favoring it and it was extremely swollen. He was speaking Portuguese so fast I couldn’t catch it all. All I knew was that his arm was in pain. I told him to sit here and after Church I would find him with Carlos and we could see what we could do for him.
A brief time after this Carlos and I approached the man. As Carlos translated for me I could hardly believe what he was telling me. Yesterday after he left our house he went to buy maize for his family. He was walking home (not far from us at the mission). When he got to the waterfall, there were 2 men there. They asked him to stop and wanted to steal his maize from him. He refused to give it to them; he took off running, slipped, fell and hit his arm on a rock. Today he can’t move his arm and he is in visible pain. As usual, I looked to Carlos to know what to do in this situation. After a bit of discussion we decided to give some pain medicine and follow up with the man in the next couple of days to let us know how he is. It’s Tuesday night and I haven’t seen him yet. When I gave him the medication, I prayed for him. I prayed hard for him. I begged God to do a miracle in this mans life- to be his provider and sustainer.
I wonder if his family is still hungry? I am sure the men that wanted to steal the food from him also have hungry family members. It’s just another “hungry season” I guess.
As I struggle to wonder how I myself will make it through this “hungry season.” I am reminded of a song Ali Rogers sings. I need to regularily remind myself to have hope:

Hope is strength to walk along,
and music to my song.
I’ll be redeemed.

I am never knowing,
I’ll be holding onto hope…

If I wait until light is shining,
I may never find the day.

Hope, I’ll be waiting.
I’ll be holding onto…

I am never knowing,
I’ll be holding onto hope.

I'LL BE HOLDING ONTO HOPE this hungry season.

How many worlds are in ours?

Slowly I have had a bit of time to process things of the last few weeks. Slowly I say, because nothing I experience lately is easy. I rested in Ghana, I laughed, I ate well. It was a wonderful time. It was exactly what I needed. I was rejuvenated- somewhat.

What I can’t seem to comprehend is the three worlds I traveled through to get there. I left Mozambique- desperate, hungry, sick. I flew to Johannesburg, South Africa. Suddenly I was in another world. I browsed through shops. I drank coffee. I was in the Western world. Then I remembered my 3 months in SA. It’s not like this. Beyond these walls they too are desperate, hungry and sick. I was in 2 completely different worlds in a matter of a few hours.

Onto my final destination, another world.

In Ghana, life is good. The city is becoming more and more Western. As we drive hours from the capital, it gets more rural. You feel like you’re in Africa. When I stay in the village- it’s Africa. Goats, sheep, chickens make there melodies at all hours. There’s no electricity. Children haul water containers on their heads. The villagers work in their farms while the women spend most the day preparing their dinner (from the products of the farm). Here the people aren’t as sick. In my mind they have very little but it's okay. What they do have is priceless. The children have a deeper desire to learn than I have ever seen. They are hungry for knowledge. It’s another world.

My life in America- yet another world.
Four very different worlds.

All with their problems.
All with their strengths.
All with joy.
All with struggles.
All with desperation.
All in need of hope.
All in need of more of the Lord.
All making me think.

What is my part in the larger world?
What is our part?
What is yours?

I guess I haven’t processed much. As I have been trying to write this for a couple hours now, I can’t find a way to conclude. Again, I have no answers. Again, I have more to think about. Again, I am challenged. Blessed, but challenged. I don’t know if this make sense. I don’t know if it is worth posting. I can’t express all that I think and feel- this is my feeble attempt.

There’s a lot out there…
God is bigger than it all…
Please pray!

Holiday Overview

Do you remember the school I helped teach in last year? The new school is now complete and it is beautiful!! (and so are the dear students that attend!)


Here I am helping harvest cocoa.


Oh, sweet little Eric's lamb!



Here Praise and I are enjoying the beach. The last night with them Christine, Praise and I enjoyed at a beautiful beach resort. Many thanks to all of you who encouraged me to take the time to go to Ghana. Also, for you who helped us be able to spend this time at the beach. Thanks not only from me but also from Christine and Praise as we all thoroughly enjoyed our time. Thank you so much!


Christine, Praise and me enjoying dinner on the beach. A couple days of admiring the majesty of God at the beach really reminds me of His greatness and His power. A God who can tell the waves where to stop and has more thoughts for me than there are grains of sand- that is worth standing in reverence!

I love Ghana!

Hi all- just a quick message to touch base. I am in an internet cafe in Ghana and will be starting my trek back to Mozambique tomorrow. I will write a more indepth message when I have time to think, process my time and better articulate my thoughts. Let's just say that I have daily praised God for allowing me to have this time- time to reconnect with friends, students and the village people, time to rest, itch LOTS of bug bites, read and reflect. If nothing else (and there is more but if this were the only thing I get from this time) I have realized what a gift it is that I have been give this opportunity to have relationships with people who live in a rural African village. God has allowed me to see a larger world (outside of the States). I now respect a different culture, a different people group. Not only do I respect them but I care about them, I love them. I have spent time in the last 2 weeks with children and young people that I really want to see be blessed. They are young people with hope, with dreams and a desire to live big, and well. They are children that have touch my heart deeply and that I have to fight off tears when saying goodbye to them. What a blessing and gift this is- to have even more wonderful people in my life. Thank you God!
Gosh, all this and I haven't even mentioned the example, friendship and inspiration of Kirk and Christine! I have a lot to share with you! For now, know I have had a wonderful time, I am doing well and look forward to heading back to Mozambique and "finishing well!"
I just made my return flight arrangements and will be arriving back in Phoenix on February 13, 2009- it really is coming quickly! Blessings and please email me...my inbox has significantly decreased the last couple months. I do apologize that I don't personally email as often as I would like- but I do love hearing from you. Miss you!

Living Truth

I have lots of things on my mind as I get ready to start my "holiday" tomorrow. I just wanted to write a quick message before I go off to the bush of Ghana...
One thing I wanted to mention is that the programs that the film crew from Canada came to tape are supposes to be air in October. It is my understanding that the last 3Sundays of October are supposes to be the programs related to Hands at Work. The first week about South Africa, second, Mozambique and third, Malawi. The program is called "Living Truth". It is a program from Toronto, Canada (Pastor Charles Price) but I think it airs on some stations in the US as well. I believe that their website is www.livingtruth.org I would think that you could find out on their site how to watch these programs. I hope some of you can see them and really get a feel and glimpse of where I am and what I am doing. Let me know how they are too.
Okay, off to bed. I am exhausted as I saw Bridget off today. It was so great to have her and the time went too quickly.
If you don't hear from me for the next 2 weeks just trust that I am in great company relaxing and rejuvenating. Please pray for safety as I travel and to stay healthy. Also that it truly will be a time of renewal and I will be ready to come back to Mozambique with renewed joy, enthusiasm, energy and desire to finish off my last few months here. Thank you so much. Thanks to those who encouraged me to take this time and go "find rest". I know that it is much needed. I go with anticipation.

Here's a word that has been on my mind and heart this week:
Eze 22:30 And I sought for a man among them, that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.

Would love to hear from you!

Cast Your Burdens

The Rubatano Volunteers



Since I last wrote a lot has been happening. The team from California left yesterday. The last 10 days have gone so quickly as we were busy showing the work of Rubatano and doing lots of special events. One day we hosted a workshop for about 250community caregivers, the next a workshop for 45 Rubatano volunteers, the next a day for over 400 children to gather and play. It was busy and it's getting hot so by evening we were all ready for some rest.
As usual seeing so much and processing the lives lived here in Mozambique can be exhausting. It has been incredible to see things anew again. With Bridget here, and the team, I have been sharing and rethinking a lot of what I have been experiencing in the last few months. It is A LOT to process. I am repeatedly reminding myself that it is because of all this that I would obviously be tired. Today I have been thinking...most of these things that burden me, and make me feel so overwhelmed, are truly not my burdens to bear. "Cast all your anxiety on him for he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7 That sounds simple enough doesn't it? Unfortunately it is something I am struggling with. So I pray for the faith to be able to do my part yet cast my anxiety unto Jesus to do the real work. I continue to be thankful for the perfect timing for Bridget to come and for the team to come. It was such an encouragement to have the team from Wellsprings here. It was incredible to see and hear the things that were challenging them. Most of all it was exciting to know that now 9 new people have seen the work, the need and the heartache here. Thank you Wellsprings from coming and caring. Thanks for your encouragement and energy.



As I continue to try to find renewal, energy and strength, I am looking forward to a break. After much prayer and contemplation, a few weeks ago I decided that I need a rest. On Oct 2nd I am flying to Ghana to spend 12 days and see the friends that I spent time with last year! I am so excited. When I told the people from the team that I was going there for my "holiday" I realized how much I have changed in the last couple years. I never dreamt that I would think a holiday would be to go somewhere where there is no running water and I may eat rat! BUT, I am sure that it's the company that will truly grant me the rest I need. As I enjoy the last few days of Bridget's stay I look forward to this trip and a chance to leave behind some burdens, at least for a few days.
Please pray for me as I continue to learn how to "Cast my burdens..."

Blessed

God is good to me. Very good to me. I have always known this but yet again I am reminded. As fatigue, exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed has heavily set in I am slowing being restored, renewed and refreshed.
Before I left AZ to come to Africa there were numerous people speaking of visiting Mozambique. Of course this sounded wonderful but I wasn't sure it would really happen. Well...Thursday I made the 2 hour trek to Beira to pick up Bridget at the airport. How fun it has been to show her the area, introduce her to people and to see things with fresh eyes again. As Bridget read me the email she was writing to her family and friends, I cried. I am not sure why. I think it's because after all this time finally someone else can see the things that make me laugh, cry and get on my knees to pray. It's so special to have her here and to share this time with her. What a blessing!



Before heading out to the "bush" we enjoyed some seafood at the beach. Mmmm, prawn curry- my Mozambican favoriite!



Here I am buying some vegatables at the market today. When I couldn't understand the number that the guy was saying he grabbed a carrot to write the number on the dirt. So clever.
I will try to write in the next couple weeks but if it isn't as frequent it's cause I am enjoying my time with Bridget. We also have a team coming from CA on Tues and they'll be here for 9 days- we'll be busy.

Do you have a Mom and Dad?

I realize I write for therapy. Sometimes it’s here; sometimes it’s in my journal. Again today, I have a lot on my mind.
There’s a girl here at the mission. She’s 15 years old. I met her one of the first days I arrived to Mozambique. At that time she was pregnant, very pregnant. She’s petite. When I met her, she was stone faced. I am sure she didn’t want to be pregnant. Shame, fear and anger was written all over her face. The night before she delivered when we sat with her she hardly responded to any interaction. I wondered if she even knew what was about to happen. A few days after she successful delivered her baby we were asked to pray for her. She needed to bond with her baby, to show some interest and interact with her- to feed her. Eventually she did, she’s now feeding her baby and taking care of her needs. She’s now a Mom.
Recently she’s been stopping by our house more. She quietly comes to the door. She still doesn’t say much- her English isn’t that strong, neither is my Portuguese. It’s a bit awkward sometimes. I don’t know what to say after a few minutes. She drinks some juice and eats an apple.
One time I was taking my bath and heard her come. There were some others sitting on the veranda with Laura so I didn’t rush my bath. When I opened the door of the bathroom she came in, “Sista Dara? I need money. Tomorrow I need to take the baby to the hospital for injections and I don’t have money for the chapa (transport).” I am ashamed to say my first thought was, “oh, great, now I she’ll be coming asking for money all the time.” Then it hit me. This girl didn’t ask for this life. She didn’t even really want this baby. She’s asking for the equivalent of 2 dollars. I gratefully gave her the money.
Today she stopped by again. She was suddenly at the door, as quiet as a mouse. I invited her in. I greeted her with the typically Mozambique greetings and got her her juice and her apple. That’s about all I know to say to her. Then we sat in silence. She doesn’t feel uncomfortable, I do. Baby is eating- Wow, is she beautiful. She has such a thick head of gorgeous black, curly hair.
Then as I sat there with the pile of “work” before me, she said, “Do you have a mom and dad?”
I was shocked. Frightened even to respond. “Yes, yes, I do. I am very blessed,” I said.
She pressed on, “Do you have family?”
“Yes, I have a sister and a brother-in-law and a nephew.”
“Oh,” she said expressionless.
Then it was silent again.
I wondered what she was thinking. I can’t relate. I don’t know what to talk to this young mom about. I can’t even believe we are living on the same planet. She asks if I have a mom and dad like I ask my friends if they have a boyfriend- they may, they may not- no big deal either way, just a question.
I spent the rest of the afternoon with her. She’s so quiet. I don’t know what to say. I am learning though. Maybe I don’t need to say anything at all. She keeps coming back. I don’t know what to do but I’ll sit with her- in silence. If she wants to talk, I’ll talk. If she wants to eat apples- I’ll buy an orchard.
I don’t know what to do with these thoughts. I don’t know what to do with these relationships. I don't know. I just don't know.
I’ll see what tomorrow brings and I’ll pray that I can love enough to make a difference, that she'll know she's loved.
Even just to one…

Wind, fire and prayers!

This week has, yet again, showed me more challenges of life here in Africa. As if I wasn't thinking life here isn't hard enough for these people, it just got harder. It's been crazy this week. This time of year it is quite common for the people to burn the land to clear brush and tall grass. A good idea if your other option is to clear the whole land by hand with a machete. BUT, it is a bad idea if there are gale force winds and your house has a dried grass roof. Tuesday I did home care and the wind was blowing so much my skin turned black and the volunteers skin turned white. In some places on my drive home there was fire on both sides of the road. Despite this, there were still people riding along the road on their bicycles hauling wood, charcoal or livestock. What else can you do when you need to survive? To make a long week brief, the wind and fire did major destruction on Tuesday. Many houses lost their roofs. Many houses burned to the ground- some with people inside. Some people died as they were working in their fields and the fires encircled them. Things are heavy here. Heavier. I figure it is bad when I hear Mozambicans say they just wish Jesus would come back. Somehow we keep keeping on. I find things to laugh at. We've been out of power all week. As a result my new favorite accessory is a head lamp! In an attempt to save my food I ate more meat last night than I usually eat in a week. It's always interesting. Despite it all, God is good, tomorrow will be better and if my heart hurts, how much more does God's?
Keep praying...miss you all!
(If you don't hear from me it's cause we still don't have electricity, I am in town at a friend's now typing this. I will be back on the weekend if there still isn't power).