AT THE LEAST, SAY A PRAYER...
remembering those
broken
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Success
What is success?
How do you measure the success of an event? Is it by the number of those in attendance? Is it by the food and amenities? Is it by the organizational flow without major glitches?
I don’t know how you measure success but I can boldly say that I have been honored to be a part of what I feel were two huge successes.
On November 7th the first HIV/AIDS Talk; AIDS and the Gospel Conference was a huge success. I don’t have any huge numbers or ground breaking news to report but I can say that when you hear the stories of people whose lives have been, and are being, personally impacted by the HIV/AIDS you can’t walk away untouched. I don’t think hearing these speakers was just to feed my own passion, I trust that God called EACH and every person that was there there for a purpose.
It was quite an emotional day for me. I feel it an incredible testimony to have been part of such an event. It all came together with three willing hearts. Three individuals who wanted to “do” something...prayed. That's what we did. The Lord introduced me to Hannah within the first weeks of my being in Minnesota. Soon Peter joined us and we started praying. Each week we met we all had new updates as to leadings that just seemed to be “happening.” I can’t even explain how I ended up in Sheila’s apartment one day who then introduced us to Monica (an MD from Sudan). I have no idea how we were able to get Caroline and her family (from Project Hopeful in Chicago www.projecthopeful.com) to join us. These where the powerful speakers that poured out their experiences and hearts.
All I can say was God put this together and it was an honor to be a part of. I was touched and I believe others were to. It was exciting to hear a day of people with similar passions in their hearts- a passion placed in our hearts by God.
I believe this was a success.
But how do you measure success when it relates to matters of the heart?
This was a success.
I am sure.
AND THEN…
On November 12th my heart was overjoyed to have George here from South Africa. AGAIN, I was honored to have the day to hear George speak, twice. I was challenged with my experiences “behind” me as to what I will continue to do with what I have seen and heard. George challenged that we, as the North American church, need to come to the point in our own “world” that we are willing to draw a line and say “this is enough! As long as I eat, they’ll eat (children in Africa).” This is so real to me but so confusing when I'm here in the middle of America.
I almost had to pinch myself when I looked around and saw George speaking with my friends, aunt and uncle, cousins and parents. I never truly imagined that George, the heart behind Hands at Work, would ever be riding in my car. I was blessed.
So, here again- no big headline news, no earthshattering changes, no monsterous donations (that I'm aware of)- or were there? Perhaps there were and I don’t know. My North American mind wants a meter to measure success but I guess it’s all different when your doing Kingdom work.
How do we measure success?
I believe these were both huge successes! I guess I don't need to see success- I can feel it.
Thank you Lord for allowing me to be a part of these events.
How do you measure the success of an event? Is it by the number of those in attendance? Is it by the food and amenities? Is it by the organizational flow without major glitches?
I don’t know how you measure success but I can boldly say that I have been honored to be a part of what I feel were two huge successes.
On November 7th the first HIV/AIDS Talk; AIDS and the Gospel Conference was a huge success. I don’t have any huge numbers or ground breaking news to report but I can say that when you hear the stories of people whose lives have been, and are being, personally impacted by the HIV/AIDS you can’t walk away untouched. I don’t think hearing these speakers was just to feed my own passion, I trust that God called EACH and every person that was there there for a purpose.
It was quite an emotional day for me. I feel it an incredible testimony to have been part of such an event. It all came together with three willing hearts. Three individuals who wanted to “do” something...prayed. That's what we did. The Lord introduced me to Hannah within the first weeks of my being in Minnesota. Soon Peter joined us and we started praying. Each week we met we all had new updates as to leadings that just seemed to be “happening.” I can’t even explain how I ended up in Sheila’s apartment one day who then introduced us to Monica (an MD from Sudan). I have no idea how we were able to get Caroline and her family (from Project Hopeful in Chicago www.projecthopeful.com) to join us. These where the powerful speakers that poured out their experiences and hearts.
All I can say was God put this together and it was an honor to be a part of. I was touched and I believe others were to. It was exciting to hear a day of people with similar passions in their hearts- a passion placed in our hearts by God.
I believe this was a success.
But how do you measure success when it relates to matters of the heart?
This was a success.
I am sure.
AND THEN…
On November 12th my heart was overjoyed to have George here from South Africa. AGAIN, I was honored to have the day to hear George speak, twice. I was challenged with my experiences “behind” me as to what I will continue to do with what I have seen and heard. George challenged that we, as the North American church, need to come to the point in our own “world” that we are willing to draw a line and say “this is enough! As long as I eat, they’ll eat (children in Africa).” This is so real to me but so confusing when I'm here in the middle of America.
I almost had to pinch myself when I looked around and saw George speaking with my friends, aunt and uncle, cousins and parents. I never truly imagined that George, the heart behind Hands at Work, would ever be riding in my car. I was blessed.
So, here again- no big headline news, no earthshattering changes, no monsterous donations (that I'm aware of)- or were there? Perhaps there were and I don’t know. My North American mind wants a meter to measure success but I guess it’s all different when your doing Kingdom work.
How do we measure success?
I believe these were both huge successes! I guess I don't need to see success- I can feel it.
Thank you Lord for allowing me to be a part of these events.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Please Join Us
You are invited…
To hear George Snyman, founder of Hands at Work in Africa.
George will be in Minneapolis, from South Africa, for one day speaking and sharing his heart and the heart of Hands at Work .
WHEN : 7 p.m., Thursday, Nov. 12
WHERE: Vision of Glory Lutheran Church ://www.vogchurch.com/ 13200 State Highway 55, Plymouth, MN 55441
WHO: Anyone interested in hearing about God’s heart and how God is working in Africa. Come hear how you can be involved with Hands at Work.
Refreshments and fellowship to follow.
Here is a word from George:
WHEN : 7 p.m., Thursday, Nov. 12
WHERE: Vision of Glory Lutheran Church ://www.vogchurch.com/ 13200 State Highway 55, Plymouth, MN 55441
WHO: Anyone interested in hearing about God’s heart and how God is working in Africa. Come hear how you can be involved with Hands at Work.
Refreshments and fellowship to follow.
Here is a word from George:
With 180 000 new orphans every month in Sub-Sahara Africa the Church in large must ask the question, "What does the Bible say about this to us? What does it mean to my congregation who lives in a global village? How can this bring new spiritual life, meaning and context to us as Christians in North America?" As desperate as the African Church is for physical support from North America to help this orphan generation, the North American Church is equally desperate to get involved in something that will bring spiritual insight, life and purpose to them. There has been only a few opportunities in history where the world was looking at the Church and said, "Only you can solve this problem!" The AIDS pandemic in Africa is such an opportunity. It is a window to display the heart of the Father and the compassion of Christ on centre stage. It is also an opportunity for us to bring compassion in action right back into our Churches. Christianity is something that must be lived - sacrificial living brings life! That is the very core of our Good News! The big challenge Church leaders face is how to get involved. Hands at Work is an African organization with strong relationships with Churches in many countries in Africa. Our passion is to mobilise these Churches in the poorest areas with the least resources to support the orphans, widows and dying and to care for them holistically. In doing this we invite the Church outside Africa to partner with us in this.
Read more about Hands at Work at
http://www.handsatwork.org/
Please come, hear more and bring your friends!!!
Contact Dara Hillstrom if you have any questions: 480-272-2742 or darajean15@hotmail.com
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Mark Your Calenders, Nov 12
Think for a moment. Is there one thing that you just wish everyone you love and care about could understand about you? Is there anything you long for people to understand completely, if even for just a brief moment? What is that one thing that you find yourself thinking on occasion (or more often) that others just don't seem to understand? (I trust I'm not the only one who has these things;) And what if you did have the opportunity to give these friends a chance to, if not fully, at least get a glimpse of understanding into the very depths of your heart.
Well...if your reading this you probably know and can at least verbalize what you think my hearts cry is. Some of you understand and other probably just wish "Dara could talk about something else," and many wish you could understand more but Africa seems like such a foreign world that it's almost impossible to feel anything real from the stories of it.
On November 12 George Snyman, the founder of Hands at Work in Africa (based in South Africa), will be in Minneapolis doing 2 speaking engagements. In the morning he'll be meeting with Pastors and church leaders to address what the churches responsibility and roll is, and can be, in responds to the AIDS pandemic. In the evening George will speak about the work of Hands at Work and what God is doing throughout Africa. This will be open to everyone, so please, spread the word and join us.
This is a great opportunity to hear and understand what and who has been a part of my life and influenced me. George has been a significant person whom God has used to show me His heart! I will post a message as soon as the final details of times and places for these events are set. Please, do all you can to mark your calenders to join us. Maybe together we can understand more.
More importantly that having you understand my heart, I pray we can understand more of God's!
Well...if your reading this you probably know and can at least verbalize what you think my hearts cry is. Some of you understand and other probably just wish "Dara could talk about something else," and many wish you could understand more but Africa seems like such a foreign world that it's almost impossible to feel anything real from the stories of it.
On November 12 George Snyman, the founder of Hands at Work in Africa (based in South Africa), will be in Minneapolis doing 2 speaking engagements. In the morning he'll be meeting with Pastors and church leaders to address what the churches responsibility and roll is, and can be, in responds to the AIDS pandemic. In the evening George will speak about the work of Hands at Work and what God is doing throughout Africa. This will be open to everyone, so please, spread the word and join us.
This is a great opportunity to hear and understand what and who has been a part of my life and influenced me. George has been a significant person whom God has used to show me His heart! I will post a message as soon as the final details of times and places for these events are set. Please, do all you can to mark your calenders to join us. Maybe together we can understand more.
More importantly that having you understand my heart, I pray we can understand more of God's!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Watch Online Today!
I just got finished watching the Living Truth production about Hands at Work in Mozambique. It's fabulous. My heart is overwhelmed with praise to see how the lives of children and families that I visited last year have changed through the work of Hands at Work volunteers. Those of you who have spent hours looking at my pictures with me will recognize faces on this new production, because of that I hope it's more personal for you. I hope these children are more than a number to you, more than a statisic. They are God's beloved. They're suffering and they're children with hopes and dreams. I have hugged these very children. God has given me the opportunity to know these children and we are called to them.
Watch and pray.
http://www.livingtruth.ca/
(on the right side there's a box that says, "Living Truth News" click on the Watch Now in green)
Watch and pray.
http://www.livingtruth.ca/
(on the right side there's a box that says, "Living Truth News" click on the Watch Now in green)
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Living Truth Returns to Mozambique
Remember last year when I was in Mozambique and the tv crew from Canada came to film the work of Hands at Work in Mozambique? Well, they returned this year to show the progress that was made from the funds raised by the telethon. I cannot WAIT to see how things have changed and to see those familiar faces that I love. I was just looking online to find how we can see this in the States. What I have found is this:
On Sunday October 11 at 8AM EST (that would be 7AM Central time, right?) on National NRB Network (DirectTV channel 378) they will be showing and doing the "telethon" for "Hands at Work- Mozambique: Back to Africa."
You can also watch online after it has aired at: http://www.livingtruth.ca/ (someone needs to teach me how to make this a direct link:)
Check it out the website and you may see Carlos's familiar face:) I hope you have the chance to watch this on tv or tape it (or whatever people do these days;), or watch it online. Be blessed as this is aired and see how God has continued to work in Mozambique. I can't wait to see Carlos on TV. Please watch and pray.
On Sunday October 11 at 8AM EST (that would be 7AM Central time, right?) on National NRB Network (DirectTV channel 378) they will be showing and doing the "telethon" for "Hands at Work- Mozambique: Back to Africa."
You can also watch online after it has aired at: http://www.livingtruth.ca/ (someone needs to teach me how to make this a direct link:)
Check it out the website and you may see Carlos's familiar face:) I hope you have the chance to watch this on tv or tape it (or whatever people do these days;), or watch it online. Be blessed as this is aired and see how God has continued to work in Mozambique. I can't wait to see Carlos on TV. Please watch and pray.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
NOVEMBER 7th
PLEASE CONSIDER COMING TO THIS EXCITING, IMPORTANT, STRAIGHT FROM MY HEART EVENT:
(click images to enlarge)
If you have any questions, please email me: darajean15@hotmail.com
If you don't live in the area and can't come would you please consider praying as the planning and prep continues for this day? If you are one of my dear friends in AZ or anywhere else in the country/world don't you think this would be a great excuse to come visit me here in Minneapolis:) All are welcome!!
More info as the day draws nearer...
(click images to enlarge)
If you have any questions, please email me: darajean15@hotmail.com
If you don't live in the area and can't come would you please consider praying as the planning and prep continues for this day? If you are one of my dear friends in AZ or anywhere else in the country/world don't you think this would be a great excuse to come visit me here in Minneapolis:) All are welcome!!
More info as the day draws nearer...
Saturday, July 11, 2009
The Heart of God
I went to a Jeremy Riddle concert tonight. I was volunteering at the Compassion International table. I always love doing this. This is the first concert I have been to since returning from Mozambique. Tonight was especially moving to my vulnerable heart. Before the concert started this one guy kept coming back to the table. I could tell that he was really contemplating sponsoring a child. He would ask some questions and then leave, come back and look at the little faces again and then leave. Throughout his many visits to the table he asked a number of financial questions. I could tell that finances were what was holding him back- he wasn't sure he could afford this commitment.
Once the concert started it only took him about 2 songs before he came back to the table and sponsored a little guy from Bolivia. It was a beautiful thing to watch. He contemplated, he prayed and I believe he is sacrificing for this child. This man will be blessed for this. I just wish I could have stood on that stage and told everyone what this man just did and what an impact he is making. I have seen first hand the life changing impact that sponsoring children makes. It saves a life and hopefully a soul.
Whenever I volunteer at concerts like this I look forward to hearing how the artist shares about Compassion and what it means to them. These artists are the ones who get to stand on the stage and share the impact of Compassion.
Jeremy Riddle spoke from his heart. He shared about what he has seen come from Compassion. Then he read Isaiah 58:6-11,
Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Hearing his heart reinforced my own. Well, no. Not mine- GOD'S! This is God's heart. Undoubtedly GOD's HEART IS WITH THE POOR! God's heart is with Mozambique, with South Africa, with Liberia, with Brazil, with each orphaned child. What a treasure it is to seek after the heart of God. What a blessing it is for my heart to care (minutely compared to what it does to Gods heart) for something that grieves the heart of GOD! What a gift- we're blessed to be a blessing...
www.compassion.com
Once the concert started it only took him about 2 songs before he came back to the table and sponsored a little guy from Bolivia. It was a beautiful thing to watch. He contemplated, he prayed and I believe he is sacrificing for this child. This man will be blessed for this. I just wish I could have stood on that stage and told everyone what this man just did and what an impact he is making. I have seen first hand the life changing impact that sponsoring children makes. It saves a life and hopefully a soul.
Whenever I volunteer at concerts like this I look forward to hearing how the artist shares about Compassion and what it means to them. These artists are the ones who get to stand on the stage and share the impact of Compassion.
Jeremy Riddle spoke from his heart. He shared about what he has seen come from Compassion. Then he read Isaiah 58:6-11,
Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Hearing his heart reinforced my own. Well, no. Not mine- GOD'S! This is God's heart. Undoubtedly GOD's HEART IS WITH THE POOR! God's heart is with Mozambique, with South Africa, with Liberia, with Brazil, with each orphaned child. What a treasure it is to seek after the heart of God. What a blessing it is for my heart to care (minutely compared to what it does to Gods heart) for something that grieves the heart of GOD! What a gift- we're blessed to be a blessing...
www.compassion.com
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Isaiah 1:17
God works in mysterious, no, MIRACULOUS ways! In November 2008 when my college friend Sarah Berreth boarded a plane to visit me in Mozambique she had no idea what that trip would be the start of. I couldn't stop crying when I saw her in the Chimoio airport. I couldn't believe that she was the second of my close friends to travel to the other side of the world to see me. Little did I know that God had much more in store than using her to get me through a very tough time in Mozambique.
Today, Sarah is back in Mozambique living and working on the mission where I lived. Over the course of her 6 months back in the States God continued to move in her heart as He had started to do while she was in Mozambique. Sarah, being the tender-hearted, obedient servant she is responded, in faith, and left on May 31 for the biggest change of her life. She bought a one-way ticket to Mozambique and is open to what the Lord may have in store for her.
Life in Mozambique is hard. It was hard for me. It's hard for Sarah. Somedays, weeks, months will be better than others. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I wouldn't have made it had I not had the support I did from "home." Without the prayers of all of you, God only knows what my year could have been like.
Mozambique. It's a tough place- a WONDERFUL place but a difficult place. PLEASE, as you think of it pray for Sarah. My heart aches for I know how difficult it is. My heart also yearns for the joy I know is there. My heart misses Mozambique more than I have ever missed anything before.
If you feel so moved as to follow Sarah's journey on her blog I know you'll be blessed (she doesn't have internet set up yet though). Her address is: www.temperarysojourner.blogspot.com (sorry, I can't get it to make an easy click link!) Also, I know she would be blessed to get encouraging words from anyone, everyone (I was!)! Her email is: sarah_berreth@hotmail.com
Sarah shared this verse as she prepared to be obedient and go: Isaiah 1:17 Learn to do good; seek justice, rebuke the oppressor; defend the fatherless, plead for the widow.
Sarah read this and responded. How pleased the Lord must be!!!
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Move, so I can move
I have a love/hate relationship with technology. I love that it allows me to be in touch with far more people than I would otherwise be able to. I hate that I hear important life news by means of things like Facebook and text messages. I dislike that we don’t always get to look people in the eye and share news. In addition, we sometimes don’t even get to hear an audible voice in the delivery of important information. As much as I hate it, I have conformed to the culture and I am guilty of my very own convictions.
I love it because I often can’t articulate my heart verbally and on those days when I have something to “blog” about, I feel free. I feel free to express and share in a deeper way than I could without this modern theory of maintaining relationships. If I am not able to have the time or proximity to communicate with all I desire, at least with this crazy thing of a blog you can hear my heart, as cold as reading from a web address may be. I apologize for sharing via a piece of technology.
As much as I love and hate doing this, it is about as much as my emotions can handle some days.
I want to share with you the last few weeks of my life. As you have probably gathered from past writings, my return from Mozambique has been a challenge, a genuine struggle actually. It has been a battle, but not a battle without hope.
About a month ago, as I sat crying and contemplating life in a retirement park in Mesa, AZ I decided I needed to return to MN for a visit. This decision was made with the desire that in doing so, I would “feel” what was right for my future- settle (for now) in MN, AZ or somewhere else? A long story short, I spent a few days in Minneapolis (with 2 job interviews), Willmar, Duluth, Remer, Fargo. I then returned to Phoenix with the same uncertainty and not “feeling it”. I contemplated another week, celebrated a beautiful wedding of dear friends and then it came to me. “Dara- move so you can see Me move.” I’m not one to hear a loud, booming, audible voice from the Lord but I ask for it. I speak to Him and I expect Him to speak. It seems crazy, it feels crazy, but I finally came to the point that I knew it was the right time to leave- to drive away from what I called home for the last 5 years. In coming to this decision, I knew I needed to do it and do it quickly. I never do well with goodbyes and it would never be easy to leave a place I have grown to love. Emotionally, I needed to just go. On Monday, I decided that I would leave Thursday to drive back to Minneapolis and arrive in time for a scheduled interview on Monday, May 18.
I did.
I packed, I cried and I drove.
Now, here I sit in my new home. I have been here less than 1 week and I have seen God move, as He promised. I am living with my dear cousin 2 miles from one of my best friends from college.
I had been actively looking for jobs in Phoenix for a good 2 months now. My connections and network of friends and colleagues were helping. NOTHING was happening.
When I returned to MN for my visit, I spent time with dear friends who encouraged me to return to Phoenix and visit a Vineyard Church. I returned to Phoenix on a Saturday-- 11pm. I looked online for a near Vineyard Church. I found one-- service, 11am, perfect!
I went. I saw a former colleague from my hospice job. We visited. I was blessed.
The next Sunday I returned. We chatted again. I shared that I was contemplating a move to MN. She mentioned that she has a friend in hospice in Minneapolis.
Long story short, I moved to Minneapolis. On Monday, I receive an email with a name of a hospice nurse in Minneapolis whom I am to call the next day.
Tuesday morning I make the call and speak to a very kind woman who promises she’ll get my name out to a number of hospice agencies as hers doesn’t not have any current job openings.
One hour later, I get a call from human resources at her agency and they tell me they do indeed have an RN position they are looking to fill, I should fill out the online application.
An hour later I get a call back, can I interview tomorrow?
Yes, yes I can.
Wednesday, interview number 2 of the week (I had 1 interview in Phoenix in 2 months keep in mind).
Thursday, a call with a job offer.
Friday, I accept a full time position.
God was moving when I had no idea He was remembering me down here. Had I not returned to MN I would not have thought to go to this church. Had I not gone to this church, I would not have seen a former coworker. Had I not walked away from Phoenix in obedience and faith I would not have made the call, I would not have gotten an interview and I would not have been offered what I feel is a good job for me for now.
I didn’t plan to get another hospice job right now. My heart feels tired of the heaviness, but, with the way I see God having moved in my life I trust this is right where He wants me.
Here I am. He will give me strength when I am weak. I don’t always know where I am headed but I trust who is guiding me. While my heart is still in Mozambique, my presence is now in Minneapolis. God moved me here so stay tuned to what He is going to do next.
Whoever said being a Christian is boring? Walk by faith with me and “watch Him move.”
I love it because I often can’t articulate my heart verbally and on those days when I have something to “blog” about, I feel free. I feel free to express and share in a deeper way than I could without this modern theory of maintaining relationships. If I am not able to have the time or proximity to communicate with all I desire, at least with this crazy thing of a blog you can hear my heart, as cold as reading from a web address may be. I apologize for sharing via a piece of technology.
As much as I love and hate doing this, it is about as much as my emotions can handle some days.
I want to share with you the last few weeks of my life. As you have probably gathered from past writings, my return from Mozambique has been a challenge, a genuine struggle actually. It has been a battle, but not a battle without hope.
About a month ago, as I sat crying and contemplating life in a retirement park in Mesa, AZ I decided I needed to return to MN for a visit. This decision was made with the desire that in doing so, I would “feel” what was right for my future- settle (for now) in MN, AZ or somewhere else? A long story short, I spent a few days in Minneapolis (with 2 job interviews), Willmar, Duluth, Remer, Fargo. I then returned to Phoenix with the same uncertainty and not “feeling it”. I contemplated another week, celebrated a beautiful wedding of dear friends and then it came to me. “Dara- move so you can see Me move.” I’m not one to hear a loud, booming, audible voice from the Lord but I ask for it. I speak to Him and I expect Him to speak. It seems crazy, it feels crazy, but I finally came to the point that I knew it was the right time to leave- to drive away from what I called home for the last 5 years. In coming to this decision, I knew I needed to do it and do it quickly. I never do well with goodbyes and it would never be easy to leave a place I have grown to love. Emotionally, I needed to just go. On Monday, I decided that I would leave Thursday to drive back to Minneapolis and arrive in time for a scheduled interview on Monday, May 18.
I did.
I packed, I cried and I drove.
Now, here I sit in my new home. I have been here less than 1 week and I have seen God move, as He promised. I am living with my dear cousin 2 miles from one of my best friends from college.
I had been actively looking for jobs in Phoenix for a good 2 months now. My connections and network of friends and colleagues were helping. NOTHING was happening.
When I returned to MN for my visit, I spent time with dear friends who encouraged me to return to Phoenix and visit a Vineyard Church. I returned to Phoenix on a Saturday-- 11pm. I looked online for a near Vineyard Church. I found one-- service, 11am, perfect!
I went. I saw a former colleague from my hospice job. We visited. I was blessed.
The next Sunday I returned. We chatted again. I shared that I was contemplating a move to MN. She mentioned that she has a friend in hospice in Minneapolis.
Long story short, I moved to Minneapolis. On Monday, I receive an email with a name of a hospice nurse in Minneapolis whom I am to call the next day.
Tuesday morning I make the call and speak to a very kind woman who promises she’ll get my name out to a number of hospice agencies as hers doesn’t not have any current job openings.
One hour later, I get a call from human resources at her agency and they tell me they do indeed have an RN position they are looking to fill, I should fill out the online application.
An hour later I get a call back, can I interview tomorrow?
Yes, yes I can.
Wednesday, interview number 2 of the week (I had 1 interview in Phoenix in 2 months keep in mind).
Thursday, a call with a job offer.
Friday, I accept a full time position.
God was moving when I had no idea He was remembering me down here. Had I not returned to MN I would not have thought to go to this church. Had I not gone to this church, I would not have seen a former coworker. Had I not walked away from Phoenix in obedience and faith I would not have made the call, I would not have gotten an interview and I would not have been offered what I feel is a good job for me for now.
I didn’t plan to get another hospice job right now. My heart feels tired of the heaviness, but, with the way I see God having moved in my life I trust this is right where He wants me.
Here I am. He will give me strength when I am weak. I don’t always know where I am headed but I trust who is guiding me. While my heart is still in Mozambique, my presence is now in Minneapolis. God moved me here so stay tuned to what He is going to do next.
Whoever said being a Christian is boring? Walk by faith with me and “watch Him move.”
Monday, May 4, 2009
May 7th- World AIDS Orphan Day
As I continue to contemplate and wait on the Lord as to what is next in my life journey, I long for that sense of purpose I felt while in Mozambique. I feel disconnected and long to be in the midst of being part of something bigger, something important, something pleasing to my God. While I am here I pray for opportunities to be a part of what Proverbs 31:8-9 says:
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
ensure justice for those being crushed.
Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless,
and see that they get justice.
May 7th has been dedicated as World AIDS Orphan Day. As I was thinking about this today I was heart sick. How sad. How sad that we have a dedicated day to raise awareness to such a specific thing. It's not just a day to bring awareness of a disease. It's not just a day to remember children. Specifically, it's a day to remember children who are orphaned related to 1 disease. Even worse, we have to have such a day because much of the world is ignorant that this pandemic is actually occurring. I was reading online today about this awareness day (check it out: http://www.worldaidsorphans.org) and I came across an article that is about the very place I was in Mozambique. My heart broke as I read, knowing so well who and what the article was referring to. Suddenly my experience was not just mine but it is SUCH a problem that many organizations are present there and are writing about this desperation. Please read this article, my cries are not just my own, read others words as well: http://www.plusnews.org/Report.aspx?ReportId=82033
When I talk in depth to people about my experience in Mozambique I realize that I often don't tell a lot of joyous experiences. It is often depressing, convicting, and heart-wrenching. Today as I was catching up on the Hands at Work website I was reminded of the glorious things that did occur during the year.
During the deepest valley I walked through while in Mozambique, not knowing what else I could do, I wrote a letter to a church in California crying out for help in the midst of hungry season. I learned today just how hugely these people responded. I didn't necessarily know this was happening at the time but PRAISE GOD that people heard of a need and did something.
A similar thing also happened when I wrote on my blog the desire Carlos had to get clothes for the orphaned kids we visited. I posted a need and individuals responded and I was able to be part of a tangible need being met! I am sorry that I too easily over look these great works that God did over the course of the year.
And now again, I want to be a voice. On May 7th I want to challenge all of us to do something, to remember World AIDS Orphan Day. I don't have anything specific I am ask anyone to do but I am asking you to DO SOMETHING. There are many great organizations to get involved in that allow you to make a HUGE difference in the life of a child. Think of the individual, the masses are too overwhelming. Think of the ONE you can touch. I hear all to often people using the excuse, "I want to get involved but I want to give to a place that I know my money is going to the people that really need it." I think this is a poor excuse. If we are that concerned about our money then do some research and find that place you can trust. I have had personal experiences where I see money going to the heart of the most vulnerable. Besides, if you can figure out away to eliminate administration costs, overheads, bank transfer cost and conversion charges, let me know and we can go and make a difference. Also, the money doesn't go from your pocket to the poor, someone has to actually do the work that we aren't directly willing to do!
Please, on Thursday will you take sometime to DO SOMETHING . Commit an hour to praying for children affected by AIDS. Fast for these little ones. Decide you're going to sponsor a child (http://www.compassion.com). Donate to Hands at Work http://www.handsatwork.org/ or another organization you believe in. Check out http://www.showhope.org, an organization dedicated to helping people adopt orphaned children. Commit to something that is already happening in a local church.
I don't care what you do, just do something!! Enough with the talk. Let's make a difference. It WILL make a difference. It will, I believe we have to do something. I guarantee whatever God lays on your heart to do, it will not be done in vain. He will honor you for your awareness and obedience. What greater joy are we looking for than to make a difference in the life of a child affected by AIDS. Imagine, what if being an AIDS orphan was your story, your child's story, or your best friend's story. Wouldn't you do what you could to help?
After you do something, share it with someone else. Imagine the impact we could see if we all did SOMETHING and we challenged a few of our friends to do something as well! I want to make a difference, don't you?
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
ensure justice for those being crushed.
Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless,
and see that they get justice.
May 7th has been dedicated as World AIDS Orphan Day. As I was thinking about this today I was heart sick. How sad. How sad that we have a dedicated day to raise awareness to such a specific thing. It's not just a day to bring awareness of a disease. It's not just a day to remember children. Specifically, it's a day to remember children who are orphaned related to 1 disease. Even worse, we have to have such a day because much of the world is ignorant that this pandemic is actually occurring. I was reading online today about this awareness day (check it out: http://www.worldaidsorphans.org) and I came across an article that is about the very place I was in Mozambique. My heart broke as I read, knowing so well who and what the article was referring to. Suddenly my experience was not just mine but it is SUCH a problem that many organizations are present there and are writing about this desperation. Please read this article, my cries are not just my own, read others words as well: http://www.plusnews.org/Report.aspx?ReportId=82033
When I talk in depth to people about my experience in Mozambique I realize that I often don't tell a lot of joyous experiences. It is often depressing, convicting, and heart-wrenching. Today as I was catching up on the Hands at Work website I was reminded of the glorious things that did occur during the year.
During the deepest valley I walked through while in Mozambique, not knowing what else I could do, I wrote a letter to a church in California crying out for help in the midst of hungry season. I learned today just how hugely these people responded. I didn't necessarily know this was happening at the time but PRAISE GOD that people heard of a need and did something.
A similar thing also happened when I wrote on my blog the desire Carlos had to get clothes for the orphaned kids we visited. I posted a need and individuals responded and I was able to be part of a tangible need being met! I am sorry that I too easily over look these great works that God did over the course of the year.
And now again, I want to be a voice. On May 7th I want to challenge all of us to do something, to remember World AIDS Orphan Day. I don't have anything specific I am ask anyone to do but I am asking you to DO SOMETHING. There are many great organizations to get involved in that allow you to make a HUGE difference in the life of a child. Think of the individual, the masses are too overwhelming. Think of the ONE you can touch. I hear all to often people using the excuse, "I want to get involved but I want to give to a place that I know my money is going to the people that really need it." I think this is a poor excuse. If we are that concerned about our money then do some research and find that place you can trust. I have had personal experiences where I see money going to the heart of the most vulnerable. Besides, if you can figure out away to eliminate administration costs, overheads, bank transfer cost and conversion charges, let me know and we can go and make a difference. Also, the money doesn't go from your pocket to the poor, someone has to actually do the work that we aren't directly willing to do!
Please, on Thursday will you take sometime to DO SOMETHING . Commit an hour to praying for children affected by AIDS. Fast for these little ones. Decide you're going to sponsor a child (http://www.compassion.com). Donate to Hands at Work http://www.handsatwork.org/ or another organization you believe in. Check out http://www.showhope.org, an organization dedicated to helping people adopt orphaned children. Commit to something that is already happening in a local church.
I don't care what you do, just do something!! Enough with the talk. Let's make a difference. It WILL make a difference. It will, I believe we have to do something. I guarantee whatever God lays on your heart to do, it will not be done in vain. He will honor you for your awareness and obedience. What greater joy are we looking for than to make a difference in the life of a child affected by AIDS. Imagine, what if being an AIDS orphan was your story, your child's story, or your best friend's story. Wouldn't you do what you could to help?
After you do something, share it with someone else. Imagine the impact we could see if we all did SOMETHING and we challenged a few of our friends to do something as well! I want to make a difference, don't you?
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Happy Easter
I've been wishing I had something profound to share and inspire with this Easter but I have nothing. Or do I?...
You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.
Though he was God,
he did not think of equality with God
as something to cling to.
Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;
he took the humble position of a slave
and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form,
he humbled himself in obedience to God
and died a criminal’s death on a cross.
Therefore, God elevated him to the place of highest honor
and gave him the name above all other names,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:5-11
One day EVERYONE will be celebrating with us! Keep praying.
Shine until that day!
Happy EASTER!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Snapshot of 2008
This is a little slide show I made as I have been sharing with people here, it got a bit long, I apologize for that. It's there. Just press the play button.
Be blessed.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Is this a problem?
I am wondering if this is a problem?...Yesterday I was talking to my sister on the phone and she said to my 2 year old nephew, "Taylor, do you want to talk to Auntie?" I say over speaker phone, "Hi Taylor, how are you?"
I then hear the little squirt say, "AUNTIE, NO!! No, Auntie, I don't have any money!"
I am not sure where that came from but it made me think, and laugh (he comes up with the darnedest stuff!).
It may soon be time for me to work on something more than my tan.
After having a great week with my cousin I continue to pray for clarity as to what direction my life is to be heading. Please join me in praying as I have some big decisions to make.
Thanks for being there for me.
I then hear the little squirt say, "AUNTIE, NO!! No, Auntie, I don't have any money!"
I am not sure where that came from but it made me think, and laugh (he comes up with the darnedest stuff!).
It may soon be time for me to work on something more than my tan.
After having a great week with my cousin I continue to pray for clarity as to what direction my life is to be heading. Please join me in praying as I have some big decisions to make.
Thanks for being there for me.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
I was reading a book today and as I was snooping ahead I ran across a quote that really spoke to me. If I would have read it a year ago I am sure it wouldn't have touched me. Reading it today I found it just beautiful. It helped me understand myself a little bit. Maybe it'll help you understand me a little as well, maybe it will help you think about something of yourself.
Donald Miller writes in Through Painted Deserts:
And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter...My hope is your story will be about changing...about learning to love a child...about learning to love others more than we love ourselves...We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?...And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don't worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed.
Just beautiful.
Donald Miller writes in Through Painted Deserts:
And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter...My hope is your story will be about changing...about learning to love a child...about learning to love others more than we love ourselves...We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?...And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don't worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed.
Just beautiful.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Let's not be ordinary
Well, I hope you haven't stopped praying for me, and more importantly for Mozambique, Hands at Work and Rubatano.
I contemplated before returning to the States, will I keep blogging when I return to the US? I didn't think so. What would I have to talk about that I wouldn't already be communicating to the people closest to me. Well, here I am- blogging still. I guess I thought that once I returned from Mozambique my journey would be done- thus, any ones need to read my blog would also be finished.
I should have known better. I believe my journey may just be starting. I don't know what my next step in this journey is. I don't even know what I am doing this afternoon, yet alone tomorrow, next week or gosh, who knows, next month?? My heart starts to race just thinking about that.
So yes, here I sit at a coffee shop in what I think is Gilbert, AZ. Each day I wake with a prayer, "God give me some direction today."
It seems like it would be easier, I have been back a while now. It's not. I am told I may "just need time", "take care of yourself", rest, wait on the Lord.
So I am.
Who was I fooling that I thought I would just drop back into the land of opportunity and settle right back in?
The thoughts of malnourished babies are never far from my mind.
The voices of friends/volunteers saying, "I don't have money (25 cents) needed to take my child with malaria to the hospital."
The giggles of orphaned children still ringing in my ears.
The images of patients emaciated from HIV are real.
In a recent phone conversation with Carlos he said, "It's a very critical time here. The people, they are still hungry."
My heart is still heavy.
Yes, I know Jesus warned that the poor will always be among us. It's not my burden to take care of "the poor." But I do feel a responsibility to do my part. God opened my eyes to something more and I don't want to be ordinary. I don't want to just settle. I want to live big. This life is short and eternity isn't.
I don't want to be normal.
In the meantime, I don't know what that means but I believe there is something. I'll just keep praying, listening and hoping, hoping in more.
I wanted to share the newest video that Heather made about Mozambique. It's similar to some others I posted before but it's great. Sorry I am not techy enough to even know how to make a link but the address to watch this video about Carlos and Adao is:
http://vimeo.com/3573972
Also, if you had been financially supporting me I can't thank you enough for allowing the last year to happen. If you desire to keep supporting the work of Carlos and Hands at Work, please send checks to(not Highlands Church):
Hands at Work in Africa, USA
951 MacArthur Blvd
San Leandro, CA 94577
Or you can do it online on the Hands at Work website. www.handsatwork.org
Maybe someday soon I'll blog about what I am doing next. I will let you know as soon as I know...
I contemplated before returning to the States, will I keep blogging when I return to the US? I didn't think so. What would I have to talk about that I wouldn't already be communicating to the people closest to me. Well, here I am- blogging still. I guess I thought that once I returned from Mozambique my journey would be done- thus, any ones need to read my blog would also be finished.
I should have known better. I believe my journey may just be starting. I don't know what my next step in this journey is. I don't even know what I am doing this afternoon, yet alone tomorrow, next week or gosh, who knows, next month?? My heart starts to race just thinking about that.
So yes, here I sit at a coffee shop in what I think is Gilbert, AZ. Each day I wake with a prayer, "God give me some direction today."
It seems like it would be easier, I have been back a while now. It's not. I am told I may "just need time", "take care of yourself", rest, wait on the Lord.
So I am.
Who was I fooling that I thought I would just drop back into the land of opportunity and settle right back in?
The thoughts of malnourished babies are never far from my mind.
The voices of friends/volunteers saying, "I don't have money (25 cents) needed to take my child with malaria to the hospital."
The giggles of orphaned children still ringing in my ears.
The images of patients emaciated from HIV are real.
In a recent phone conversation with Carlos he said, "It's a very critical time here. The people, they are still hungry."
My heart is still heavy.
Yes, I know Jesus warned that the poor will always be among us. It's not my burden to take care of "the poor." But I do feel a responsibility to do my part. God opened my eyes to something more and I don't want to be ordinary. I don't want to just settle. I want to live big. This life is short and eternity isn't.
I don't want to be normal.
In the meantime, I don't know what that means but I believe there is something. I'll just keep praying, listening and hoping, hoping in more.
I wanted to share the newest video that Heather made about Mozambique. It's similar to some others I posted before but it's great. Sorry I am not techy enough to even know how to make a link but the address to watch this video about Carlos and Adao is:
http://vimeo.com/3573972
Also, if you had been financially supporting me I can't thank you enough for allowing the last year to happen. If you desire to keep supporting the work of Carlos and Hands at Work, please send checks to(not Highlands Church):
Hands at Work in Africa, USA
951 MacArthur Blvd
San Leandro, CA 94577
Or you can do it online on the Hands at Work website. www.handsatwork.org
Maybe someday soon I'll blog about what I am doing next. I will let you know as soon as I know...
Monday, February 16, 2009
Let's Pray
I am home. After a cancelled bus and lost luggage (it did arrive) I am settling in and trying to find my place. As I have returned to Arizona it feels like I never left. I find myself wondering if the last year really ever happened. The heaviness in my heart reminds me that yes, the last year really happened. It feels strange to be back. I don't know where my place is or how to make sense of things. To be very honest, like I always am, I can't make sense of the world. Perhaps I am not supposed to and shouldn't even try. I wonder who I am supposed to be. I AM of THIS culture, but a part of my heart has connected with another culture. That leaves me trying to figure out who I am in THIS culture. I haven't figured it out. I can't figure it out and I get overwhelmed and exhausted trying. Bearing this in mind, I ask for your grace. As I continue my reunions with my family and friends, please be patient with me. Be patient when I talk and make no sense. Be patient when I tell a story and can't finish it through my tears. And maybe you'll need to be patient if your with me and I have an anxiety attack when in the chaos of Walmart or the mall parking lot. Please continue your loving grace.
And the million dollar question...what is next?
Prayer- yours and mine. I need to continue to pray. Right now I have NO idea. I don't know where I will live or where I will work. I know that I am going to enjoy this weekend with Deanna- I CAN'T wait!! And I am going to spend next week with my whole family in Sedona- wonderful! I need this time. After that...I ask you to pray for me to have wisdom and desire to be wherever the Lord wants me, and to be willing to do whatever He desires.
More importantly though...will you keep faithfully praying for Mozambique- for Carlos and his family and all the dedicated volunteers that work with Rubatano? The last time I spoke to Carlos, before I left South Africa, he said, "it is bad here! The people are hungry! It is very bad!"
I asked, "Carlos, is it worse than before we left."
"Yes, it is not good and the volunteers, they are discouraged."
Now that I am not there, all I (we) can do, and the very BEST we can do, is pray! Please keep praying for these precious people that are struggling to have food on the table. What would that be like?
My motto for the year, which I often sang out loud to Laura, was this- "God will make a way, when there seems to be no way." I will continue to cling to this as I try to make sense of my life here, and their life there.
Let's pray, God will make a way!
And the million dollar question...what is next?
Prayer- yours and mine. I need to continue to pray. Right now I have NO idea. I don't know where I will live or where I will work. I know that I am going to enjoy this weekend with Deanna- I CAN'T wait!! And I am going to spend next week with my whole family in Sedona- wonderful! I need this time. After that...I ask you to pray for me to have wisdom and desire to be wherever the Lord wants me, and to be willing to do whatever He desires.
More importantly though...will you keep faithfully praying for Mozambique- for Carlos and his family and all the dedicated volunteers that work with Rubatano? The last time I spoke to Carlos, before I left South Africa, he said, "it is bad here! The people are hungry! It is very bad!"
I asked, "Carlos, is it worse than before we left."
"Yes, it is not good and the volunteers, they are discouraged."
Now that I am not there, all I (we) can do, and the very BEST we can do, is pray! Please keep praying for these precious people that are struggling to have food on the table. What would that be like?
My motto for the year, which I often sang out loud to Laura, was this- "God will make a way, when there seems to be no way." I will continue to cling to this as I try to make sense of my life here, and their life there.
Let's pray, God will make a way!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Child-Like Joy
This morning I woke up and thought it was Christmas day. My nose, the only flesh peaking out from under the down comforter, was frozen. I looked out the window and it was dark and wet. I then slowly realized that I was in England, with Adriel and it is nowhere close to Christmas. I am not sure what I was thinking or hoping for. I don't know what I was dreaming about. Perhaps I was hoping that I was waking to a new Christmas morn where the fresh images in my mind of hungry, sick, poor friends was being washed away by a fresh blanket of fluffy snow.
Again, in my search for reality I had to remind myself that, though far away now, those images are reality. Those that I worked along side and became friends with are still there. That is their reality- they are still fighting, longing to sit where I sit right now.
I must keep praying.
I must obtain that child-like faith that God is working and answering prayers- even when I don't know how things are going.
I felt like a child this morning.
If only my faith was as strong as the excitement I felt this morning when I thought I was at my aunt and uncles house on Christmas morning.
As I keep praying, I will keep moving forward. I will look for that Christmas morning, child-like joy like I felt this morning.
I think I will have another glimpse of it on Friday at about 635pm.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Brrr....
I wish I could have watched Laura and I as we landed in London. We were traveling from one terminal of Heathrow to another. When the elevator door opened we didn't know they would be opening to the outside. Much to our surprise we gasped as the wind gust reached us and snowflakes fell on our cheeks. I think our reaction may have been similar to a villager looking at the New York skyline. The others in the elevator may have been wondering the cause of our surprise and over reaction.
Now as I sit, inside the flat, I am freezing. My African wardrobe, and blood, is very happy that I am returning home to Phoenix, not Minnesota.
It's great to be back in England. It's great to hear English all the time, not a myriad of other foreign tongues. It's nice to turn on hot water from the tap and drink from it without fear of parasites and disease. It's a relief to be in semi-familiar surroundings and to be with friends that know me outside of Africa. I am grateful for this transition time. I just still can't believe that the year is over. It was a year ago that I was here with Adriel and Joel. Now I am here with them and their 2 month old daughter- I have been away a long time. It went so fast. Each day, numerous times, I am still reminding myself that I am not going back to Mozambique- I honestly can't get it in my head. It still doesn't feel real, I feel lost in transition after living this transient life for the last number of months. I am eager to get to a place where I have people around me that make me feel "at home."
I woke up this morning and also felt confused that Laura isn't here. I have thought of one million things that I want to tell her even though we have only been apart for 24 hours. This will be yet another big adjustment! I trust that Laura has arrived home safely and is with her family now. I miss you Laura!
I miss you Mozambique!
I miss you South Africa!
I miss you Hands at Work!
I miss you family and friends.
Thankfully the best part of this transition time is yet to come. I will be able to at least talk to most of you very soon, if not see you and get lots of hugs. One 11 our flight done and one more to go. Friday evening I will step off the plane with lots of stories and a heart to share. I am looking forward to it.
Now as I sit, inside the flat, I am freezing. My African wardrobe, and blood, is very happy that I am returning home to Phoenix, not Minnesota.
It's great to be back in England. It's great to hear English all the time, not a myriad of other foreign tongues. It's nice to turn on hot water from the tap and drink from it without fear of parasites and disease. It's a relief to be in semi-familiar surroundings and to be with friends that know me outside of Africa. I am grateful for this transition time. I just still can't believe that the year is over. It was a year ago that I was here with Adriel and Joel. Now I am here with them and their 2 month old daughter- I have been away a long time. It went so fast. Each day, numerous times, I am still reminding myself that I am not going back to Mozambique- I honestly can't get it in my head. It still doesn't feel real, I feel lost in transition after living this transient life for the last number of months. I am eager to get to a place where I have people around me that make me feel "at home."
I woke up this morning and also felt confused that Laura isn't here. I have thought of one million things that I want to tell her even though we have only been apart for 24 hours. This will be yet another big adjustment! I trust that Laura has arrived home safely and is with her family now. I miss you Laura!
I miss you Mozambique!
I miss you South Africa!
I miss you Hands at Work!
I miss you family and friends.
Thankfully the best part of this transition time is yet to come. I will be able to at least talk to most of you very soon, if not see you and get lots of hugs. One 11 our flight done and one more to go. Friday evening I will step off the plane with lots of stories and a heart to share. I am looking forward to it.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Changed
Laura and I had the opportunity to fly to Cape Town last week. We returned yesterday. I am afraid we aren’t the best “tourists” right now. Cape Town is the most culturally rich place I have ever been. International travelers long to come to Cape Town to see the sites and soak up the history.
My experience was quite different. As I walked into the Johannesburg airport, I couldn’t help but think of my new, dear friends in Mozambique. Over the course of a few days I went from their world (a world I now am very comfortable in) to a new world. My Mozambican friends would be very shocked to see this different world of Cape Town. My eyes saw things differently this vacation.
As I entered this massive building they call a terminal, I went up an escalator, a strange concept of electric stairs. I walked up to a machine that eventually spit out a piece of paper that would later allow me to walk onto an airplane. I then headed to the bathroom. There I used a toilet that flushed automatically, a trash can that opened with out my assistance, water than ran when I place my hands near it. I then proceeded to walk by some people where I had to place my bags on this moving table and walk through a strange doorway. I continued to walk and look to a peculiar TV screen that had a lot of important information on it. From there I knew which direction to head. Finally, for the first time upon my arrival to this large building I was forced to interact with a real person. I didn’t need to say much, I barely exchanged a greeting actually. That simple, brief encounter gave me passage to sit on an airplane, which in a couple hours I would walk off, and enter the land of shopping, food and sightseeing.
These would all be strange experiences to my new friends. I believe if they had been with me they may still be wondering why I had so rudely walked past so many people without greeting them and asking how their families are.
I already miss life in Mozambique. I miss the simplicity of the value of relationship and quality time with people.
I didn’t fit into the life of Cape Town.
It’s hard to make sense of how I go from being with people who may not have food for their family, to dining in a restaurant of my ethnic preference.
With the cares of the world behind me I was able to ride on a boat and drink coffee, laugh and watch TV.
Or did I? Were the cares of the world behind me?
No, actually. I couldn’t leave my experiences behind me. I was there, in Cape Town, but I still was seeing beggars and I slept just miles from “townships” where people are living in extreme poverty.
I wasn’t comfortable in Cape Town.
Is this unfortunate for me, that I can’t enjoy a “holiday?”
Perhaps.
Am I in for a difficult transition back to the States?
Yes, most likely. Most likely VERY difficult.
Do I wish I weren’t feeling this way?
Maybe a bit.
Would I change anything about this last year and what I am feeling as I prepare to return to the US?
Absolutely not!
I believe these are all good struggles I am having. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing, and perfect will.”
Do I understand what God’s will is? His good, pleasing and perfect will? Absolutely not. But I do believe IN it.
Do I believe I am called to be IN this world but not be OF this world? Absolutely!
What that looks like I am not too sure of but I believe God will work it out in me as I take Mozambique home with me in my heart…changed forever and pleased to be!
Friday, January 16, 2009
South Africa
I am at an internet cafe at a mall right now, I am watching the cost of my time online climb up so I don't have much time, or piece of mind to really express much. I just wanted to let you know that I have made it safely to SA. I had a great birthday (thanks for all the bday messages!). It was really hard, really hard! to leave Mozambique. I think I will slowly adjust to life here, and then life back home. It's a rollercoast of emotions. I am trying to cling to the knowledge that I know the Lord is calling me home- for now at least. Tears come at unexpected times but I am in a good place. Thanks for your continued prayers and I hope to be able to write a more thought out message soon. A lot has been happening. Bless you all and I will see you soon!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Thanks
As Laura and I prepare to leave, Carlos wrote a thank you letter that he wanted us to share with those who have supported us so faithfully here. To all of you have been so supportive of me- thank you, not only from me but also from Carlos and those I have worked with in Mozambique.
Dear Supporters,
Greetings from the hottest country, Mozambique, and Rubatano family. From the depths of our heart we would like to thank you for your great love, care and generosity for releasing our two lovely family members Dara and Laura.
We, as a family, feel very blessed. The caregivers, OVCs (orphans/vulnerable children), patients, widows, volunteers, the chief and other community members are thankful and crying because our family is leaving.
Please stand with us in prayer so that God may bring them back again if their duty is not finished. The work was made light with their presence, and the difficulties became few. We thank God for allowing them to be born and that they heard Gods’ voice to care.
We are together in Jesus Christ,
Carlos Giua and Rubatano Family
(Our power is still not fixed- I just have few minutes of power while we are at a friends house...)
Monday, January 5, 2009
The Last Week
I am sitting here after a day of errands and running around. I am tried. It's pouring down rain outside. I have a sense of joy as I think of starting my journey back to familiar. It seems like not long ago I was making my decision to come here and now I am contemplating decision regarding my return to the States. Wow! What a year!
There is rumor that the electricity transformer near the mission blew up and we may be out of power (including water) for weeks to months. This doesn't really affect me- only for the next week. I want to write much more but my internet/electricity time is limited right now. I just wanted to update you- hopefully the transformer is fixable and I will have electricity in the next week, but, if you don't hear from me that is why.
Thanks for your prayers as I prepare to leave Mozambique. Please pray that it can just be such a great week of wrapping up and that my heart will feel ready to go on Monday.
I hope to write more very soon. If not, I will as soon as I can next week. Until then...
There is rumor that the electricity transformer near the mission blew up and we may be out of power (including water) for weeks to months. This doesn't really affect me- only for the next week. I want to write much more but my internet/electricity time is limited right now. I just wanted to update you- hopefully the transformer is fixable and I will have electricity in the next week, but, if you don't hear from me that is why.
Thanks for your prayers as I prepare to leave Mozambique. Please pray that it can just be such a great week of wrapping up and that my heart will feel ready to go on Monday.
I hope to write more very soon. If not, I will as soon as I can next week. Until then...
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