the list

Thanksgiving. Praising God when it's not easy. Always being grateful. Through EVERYTHING.
These have never been my first nature reactions to difficult times. Even to mediocre times I would have to say.
Over the last 2 years, or should I say 4? I feel as if I'm to the point that I've got nothing left to try than to develop this habit of thanksgiving. To be fully alive, praising God and being grateful for every good thing in my life. "Every good and perfect gift comes from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17 As I've shared several times recently the book "One Thousand Gifts" and the authors blog aholyexperience.com have become pivotal in this new "discovery".

Counting my gifts, up to 1000, never stopping.
Praying for my eyes to be opened to see them.
To feel them.
To let them be enough for me to be happy.
For them to bring me to a deeper joy and contentment in this place that I find myself.

Nothing else has worked.
I've cried my ocean of tears.
I've written my pages of struggles.
I've begged and pleaded with the Lord.
I've tried to sleep it off.
It's not working. Nothing is working.

Today started differently. Now, I'll warn you (again), I'm no mega-spiritual person who has grandiose dreams and visions. This is me being simple and child-like, again.

155. My house has an open/revolving door.

- One of the things I love being here is that we're able to open our house up to almost any and everyone that passes through. Several times I've heard of people coming through town and I've been able to offer them a bed. In doing so, I've gained some really excellent friends and great support. When I came home from Zambia I returned to a house full of 5 women (days later it was 6) and 3 year old twins + Nede = chaos
Now, this is just background info to help you understand this morning.

156. Special surprises where you least expect them.

- Some weeks before I went to Zambia I took off one of the 2 rings that I always wear. And, underneath it I was having some weird fungal infection/eczema/skin breakdown, that I'd never had before. So, I took the ring off and put it on the window sill in the kitchen. Just before going to Zambia I wanted to wear it and I couldn't find it. I left without it. Upon my return, I thought I had remembered putting it "somewhere safe". For 3 weeks now I've been searching everywhere I could think of for this ring. Well...this morning I was making Nede's lunch for school and I found a half eaten bag of chips in the cupboard (remember I had 7 extra people in my house, I don't always know what I do and don't have), I had never eaten from this bag of chips, or seen it for that matter. As I open it up to empty the contents into a bag for Nede's lunch, there was my RING! I'll never know how that happened. I will always be thankful for:

157. "Mom, why did you put your ring inside there?"

158. Badly translated t-shirts from the market (see photo below)

159. Making construction paper chains to count down the arrival of visitors (my mom on June 15th)

160. Nede insisting on hanging things in the middle of the walkway.

(My shirt that makes me happy says: 

Happily

Camp in Summer

GREEN

it flies about

It Promises

Indefinitely)

This is it. This is my current approach. Writing my list and enjoying each little blessing that's writing this big story. And tonight I'm laughing and I haven't cried in days. Thank you Lord! Please keep teaching me to be thankful.

161. My favorite ring